Birthday Story

My Dad wrote me a story for my birthday last year sooo....here it is!!




THERE ONCE WAS A HERMIT NAMED TONY
HE LIVED IN THE SWAMP WITH HIS PONY
THE HORSE YOU MIGHT NOT KNOW ,, WAS QUITE BONEY
BECAUSE STINGEY OLD TONY WOULD NOT SHARE HIS BOLONEY
ONE DAY ON A WALK THEY MET SALLY TOURD
SHE WAS SITTING IN A TREE LOOKING BORED
HEY THERE ..SAID TONY ..I,VE GOT SOME BONONEY ,,
COME HAVE SOME AND YOU WONT BE SO BORED ...
SHE JUMPED WITH A LEAP FELL FLAT ON HER FEET
AND CUT TONYS EAR OFF WITH HER SWORD..
EEEEEYYYYOOOOWWWWW..TONY YELPED
AS HE FELL ON HIS REAR ,,THEN REACHED DOWN AND PICKED UP HIS EAR ..
I,LL THUMP YOU IN YOUR BRAIN SAID TONY ..AS HE DUCK WHEN SHE SWUNG
AGAIN AND AGAIN..
STOP SWINGING THAT SWORD OR I,LL GRAB A BOARD
AND SMACK YOUR HEAD LIKE A GOURD ..
BUT SHE DIDNT STOP ,,JUST KEPT SWINGING ALOT AS TONY DODGED AND JUMPED OUT OF THE WAY .HE REACHED FOR A STICK.FELL OVER A BRICK
AND LANDED FACE DOWN IN A DITCH ..
SHE POKED AT HIS BUTT AND HE YELPED LIKE A MUTT
AND SCREAMED AS HIS PANTS TORE
......QUIT POKING ME BEFORE I GET SORE ..
SHE JUST SMILED AT HIM AND SAID WITH A GRIN
...........I THINK I WILL POKE YOU AGAIN ..
AS SHE SWUNG BACK HER SWORD TONY REACHED FOR A BOARD ,
AND HIT POOR, OLD, SALLY TOURD .
SHE FELL ON HER BACK ,,DIDNT SEE HIM ATTACK ,,
AND WAS OUT COLD BEFORE SHE TOUCHED DOWN ...
MAN THAT WAS SCARY TONY EXCLAIMED ..
I,D BETTER GET GONE BEFORE I AM BLAMED ..
SO TONY, HIS PONY, AND HIS EAR ,WENT HOME TO PATCH UP HIS REAR ...

THE MORAL OF THIS STORY ....
NEVER SHARE BOLONEY WITH PEOPLE IN TREES ..
(((ESPECIALLY IF THEY HAVE SWORDS...))))